Tribute Wall
Monday
8
November
Visitation at Main Service
9:30 am - 10:30 am
Monday, November 8, 2021
Saint Padre Pio Parish - Church Of Our Lady Of Pompeii
4680 Dante Avenue
Vineland, New Jersey, United States
Monday
8
November
Mass
10:30 am
Monday, November 8, 2021
Saint Padre Pio Parish - Church Of Our Lady Of Pompeii
4680 Dante Avenue
Vineland, New Jersey, United States
Monday
8
November
Final Resting Place
11:30 am
Monday, November 8, 2021
Our Lady Of Pompeii Cemetery
4680 Dante Ave
Vineland, New Jersey, United States
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Ronnie posted a condolence
Tuesday, January 25, 2022
Love you Mom and miss talking to you. Talking to the sky isn't as good as I thought it would be.
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Ken posted a condolence
Sunday, November 7, 2021
It's just about 10:00 on a Sunday night. As a child, I always hated Sunday nights. It meant the weekend was over and back to school Monday morning. More times than not, my mom would make either a special dinner or dessert to ease the pain.
At the time, I thought that was pain.
As I sit here on a Sunday night, the night before say goodbye to my mother one last time, I now know that this is pain.
At tomorrow's services, I was asked to read a Bible passage for her, but the truth is that I don't have the courage to stand in front of everyone and maintain my composure long enough to get through it. She deserves better. In truth, she deserved better from me for too much of my life.
This loss is painful in a way I couldn't have known. But I do take solace in the belief that wherever the essence of her is now, she now knows how deeply I loved her and the ways in which I distanced from her were for my own well-being.
My mother led with her heart. She loved with everything she had. She was tough and principled, she spoke truth to power, she was courageous and cavalier. She looked for the best in those she loved most - and she always did everything in her power to help manifest that success.
It would be beyond the scope of this tribute to express the many things my mom taught me, but in this moment a few come to mind.
She taught me the power of going within and working to understand ourselves. She told me the power of being able to be alone without feeling lonely. For years, I didn't quite understand what she was saying. But as I grew into adulthood, I came to understand the fundamental importance of being our own person, taking in the counsel of everyone, but ultimately looking within for truth and guidance.
My mother also repeated the mantra that I could ask her anything. As a child, this liberated my intellectual curiosity, to the point where I would ask her so many questions so constantly that she would inevitably send me to my room in exasperation : )
But the true takeaway from helping me develop the capacity to question everything is that it has helped me navigate the world in a way where I always seek deeper understanding, see beyond the surface, don't fall prey to the corrosion of prejudice or banality, but instead seek a deeper knowing in all things and people I encounter.
My mother taught me how to think and be, but she also taught me how to laugh. She was incredibly charismatic, quick-witted and sharp-tongued, she showed me the importance of never taking myself or things too seriously.
My mother loved hard, with all her heart. She showed me the power of reciprocity and helped me understand the importance of giving of myself without expecting in return.
My mother had the capacity to fill a home with magic. This particularly showed up during the holidays. She would fill the house with Christmas music, decorating every addressable space within our home. There was this one little village scene on top of our gold credenza, dusted with angel hair, each of the little homes illuminated by a light. The plastic deer were disproportionately large to the size of the homes... so I always thought if I were in one of the homes, I would be terrified by the dinosaurian scale of the deer. My mother would always playfully tell me to stop analyzing everything and, in doing so, taught me in the most earthy way possible the power of getting out of my head and into my imagination and creativity.
When I think of my mom now being liberated from the confines of this life, free from the pain of betrayal, trauma, and loss, I now know she is at peace. She sees everything. She sees the mutuality of the moments which caused her pain, she sees not only both sides, but all sides of each moment and the ripple effect of every one of those moments and choices. She sees how her world was impacted by all of these things and how she in turn impacted the lives of everyone she touched.
And in this way, the enormity and arc of her life, from birth to this transition, I want memorialize this moment with this passage:
'Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting.
The soul that rises with us, our life's star,
Hath had elsewhere its setting,
And cometh from afar...
Hence in a season of calm weather
Though inland far we be,
Our souls have sight of that immortal sea
Which brought us hither,
Can in a moment travel thither,
And see the children sport upon the shore,
And hear the mighty waters rolling evermore.'
I'll think of her when I stand at the ocean's edge, waves rolling in, the tides pulling them back home, seagulls floating aimlessly above, the sun setting in the sky behind me or rising before me.
I'll think of her when walking amidst the cathedral of beauty that is this world, and I'll thank her for helping me develop the capacity to appreciate that moment.
I'll think of her when I speak an uncomfortable truth to someone and, in doing so, the moment is made more real and our relationship is made stronger because of that courage.
I'll think of her when I act in simple kindness towards another soul, not judging them for how they might seem, but taking them into my heart for who they are.
I'll think of her when I laugh, when I make a connection which sheds light on the irony and humor of the moment.
And I'll think of her when I rest my head on my pillow at night, knowing she is now truly at peace.
With all my heart, from the depths of my soul, with all that I am and will become, I love you so much, Mom.
Rest in peace.
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6aeQ9 lit a candle
Sunday, November 7, 2021
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I am so sorry to hear of Janet's passing. I fondly remember her as warm and welcoming during holiday and summer family gatherings. How she loved sharing stories of her children and grandchildren.i admired her for her passion and perseverance to succeed in business and yet she always had time for family.
I am so grateful our paths crossed on the journey of Life.
R
Ron Posted Nov 7, 2021 at 5:15 PM
Thank You Diane. Guessing you worked together. If you or anyone wants to contact me. 1fastgto@comcast.net
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Nicholle lit a candle
Sunday, November 7, 2021
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Nicholle uploaded photo(s)
Sunday, November 7, 2021
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When I think of Janet, I think of how much she loved her children, Johnny, Ronnie and Kenny with her whole heart, when they were young. She had a magnificent portrait hanging in her home office of herself, wearing a fur coat, hair coiffed and ever the glamorous blonde Mom - surrounded by her sweet faced boys. This is the Janet I truly enjoy remembering most often.
She deeply loved her sisters and brother, her parents, grand children and great grandchildren so much, too.
Though I didn't know her for a long time, just over a decade in her more than 80 years, the time in which I knew her was touched with special memories she shared.
She was the daughter of farmers from Dorothy and her favorite Strawberries that her father grew on their family farm were called 'Lupkins' and they were her favorite because of their sweetness. She said they didn't travel well to market, because they were soft, but they were a special treat to her and her siblings.
She was proud of the year she was honored in the Buena Parade or Camden Parade (?) as a bathing suit clad beauty, who was chosen to represent SEARS, a job she worked at and enjoyed in her teens or early 20's. It was a joy to hear her share the stories of her youth: how she was a little rebellious, as all teens should be, and how she loved music and dancing to "The Four Aces", falling in love and growing her beautiful family as a very young woman.
She was called "Cookie" by her beloved sisters "Bunny", Gerry and Sandy and beloved brother Joey. She could be sassy (had a personalized license plate on her Cadillac that said, "MS JSB"), tough and hard baked at times, but she could also be sweet and fun-loving, so "Cookie" seemed the perfect nickname for Janet.
She loved cooking, music and she loved to dance. What an honor it was to get to cook along side of her.....to see her drink a Dewars - neat with just a splash of water - sometimes before noon on a holiday morning to enliven the spirits and see her in all of her glory, preparing for her family to arrive. She was truly at her happiest when her family was whole and together with her.
When we took road trips to her Dad's and what would later become her brother Joey's house or when we went shopping for the day, she liked to listen to Country Music on the radio (she used to tell me that if a celebrity was to play her in a movie, she would like it to be Faith Hill, circa late 1990's-early 2000's). Often, we would stop at a Diner for her favorite lunch - a cheeseburger and a coffee and often, this was her request for Mother's Day Dinner - Cheeseburgers, Apple Pie and Ice Cream - proving her to be a true American Girl.
The holidays with Janet were magical - she would decorate every nook and cranny and bake cookies, pies, roast and cook all of her family's favorites and always have thoughtful presents for the entire family.
Her son Kenny would take her to see "A Christmas Carol" in Princeton at the McCarter Theatre every Christmas Eve; Christmas Caroles playing on his car stereo (her favorite Christmas song was John Lennon's "And So This is Christmas") and on the years I accompanied them, I sat in the back seat, watching them revel in the specialness of the tradition spent together. After the play, we would return to her home, where we would enjoy a wonderful meal together, usually a delicious Bolognese with Pasta, that Janet had prepared that morning and left warming on the stove top. We would then watch a Christmas movie before saying "Merry Christmas" by her magnificent Christmas Tree until the following day, where we would meet again as a family at her son Ronnie's home.
Though difficult life choices and rougher times didn't keep us close, we corresponded at the holidays a few years ago and I cherish our parting thoughts of appreciating one another for the memories we shared.
I will never think of Christmas without smiling and thinking of how special Janet made all of the holidays feel.
Her first born son Johnny always bought Janet an Orchid or Gardenia Corsage on Mother's Day and the joy of watching her opening the crystal clear box to smell the flowers was truly special. She loved those flowers and all flowers so he made her heart very happy.
I remember how much Janet loved celebrating her children's and grandchildren's birthdays and the photo here, is of her with her son Ronnie on his birthday. She was an incredible baker and though I don't have a photo of one of her cakes, the memories of how delicious and beautiful they were lives in my memory.
She spent Christmas Day at Ronnie and his wife (who was truly the most like her own daughter) Jamie's home with their son and her Grandson, Kyle and their collective families. She was so proud of what a beautiful tradition and gathering they created - a roaring fire in the fireplace, incredible meatballs, made by Ronnie himself as well as special touches, like Jamie's delicious baked goods and her talent for holiday decorations and libations (always a full bar in the laundry room which bolstered the festivities) - it was a wonderful family affair that blended both Ronnie and Jamie's families together - music to dance to (the Mariah Carey Christmas Album was always a big hit), grandchildren to spoil and watch open their presents from their "Gram" and and loved ones all around into the late night. Ronnie and Jamie cooked together and prepared for days in advance and their care was always appreciated by Janet. I think Christmas Day was her favorite day of the year.
I send her family, Kenny, Ronnie, Jamie, Kyle and Johnny, Jennifer, Johnny, Jimmy and respective extended families my sincere condolences along with her siblings Joey, Bunny, Gerry and Sandy.
Your Mom, Gram, Great Gram, sister was truly one of a kind and I am so sorry for her passing and send you love at this time of grieving.
I will cherish the fond memories she helped to create and picture her as a young "Cookie", waving good bye to us all from that parade float in heaven and wishing for all of us to remember all of times that warm your heart like a Christmas fire.
Farewell and rest well, Ms JSB <3
Nicholle
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Son Ronnie uploaded photo(s)
Friday, November 5, 2021
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Hotrod Janet after she took my car for a spin.
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Son Ronnie lit a candle
Friday, November 5, 2021
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rgault@mesh.prd.net posted a condolence
Friday, November 5, 2021
Janet and I enjoyed our talks over the phone as she usually called me about a "few things" which then turned into a 10-15 minute conversation about apartment life and life in general. She was a wonderful resident at Mt. Ephraim Senior Housing and I will truly miss her. She loved her family and was very proud of them and worried about their health.
May your memories sustain you through this sad time.
Warm regards,
Rosemary Gault
Property Manager
Mt. Ephraim Senior Housing
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The family of Janet S Bertino uploaded a photo
Friday, November 5, 2021
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